Community

And nothing but Community. Last week, it finally came back, and with an Abed episode! Abed is money, but the kind of money you spend sparingly, so as not to draw the attention of the IRS. I don't know where i was going with that metaphor now. Anyway, a lack of chicken strips (thanks to that thieving Starburns) spurs the gang into action, installing Abed as fry cook and building up a network of favors in exchange for sweet sweet chicken strips. Abed's position and careful planning causes him to supplant Jeff as the head of the study group (as their family became a family...in italics). Power goes to their heads, however, including Pierce's entourage and Annie's Boobs...which is the name of Troy's monkey (and a gag that never stopped being funny). They even gave Annie's Boobs its own Twitter account: www.twitter.com/anniesB00bs

Abed and Jeff share a moment (but not a Very Special one), and then share a plate of chicken strips, Sixteen Candles style. The humor isn't in Abed's stream of pop culture references (well, they're funny, but keep reading), it's in the lengths that the show goes to pay off the references, as well as the obvious love that the writers have for these pieces of our past. They aren't just referencing them for the sake of saying the words, they are using them as the cultural shorthand that they have become for members of a certain (i.e., mine) age group.

Next up, catching up on more of what I missed on my trip to Jersey, as well as some Doctor Who.

If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with

I'm just going to type a little about House, since this is the part that shows up on Facebook (hi, Facebook!), and I hate giving Lost spoilers. Like how Sawyer is really a velociraptor.

House "Lockdown" aired a week or three ago, but it was on Hulu, and I likes me some House. I guess this was their version of a bottle episode, as the hospital is on lockdown due to a missing baby. This gives us some wacky mismatched pairings, in the form of Taub/Foreman and Wilson/Thirteen, then Chase and Cameron locked in a room (oh, how sitcom-y), House in with a terminal patient, and Cuddy left to solve the Case of the Missing Baby.

Taub/Foreman was funny, as they both pop a couple of Vicodin to "feel like House" for a few hours, then wind up doing records room shenanigans, before reading each others files and doing the whole "I wish I was you/No, I wish I was you" gag.

Wilson and Thirteen play a game of Truth or Dare, where Wilson's relationship with House is examined for the hundredth time, Wilson breaks into a cash register, and Thirteen has to flash her boobs to Taub. Oh, and did we get a first name there?

Chase/Cameron was the meat, and it wasn't that meaty at first, but we finally get some truth and maybe some closure to the two of them. Good acting from both, and it's nice to see Cameron back, although it's likely a one shot deal (he said, as people who have seen the most recent two episodes are probably giggling at me).

Cuddy finds the baby.

And finally, we get another iteration of House dealing with his own issues through those of a patient. I dug the consequences of the 19/20 cases that House doesn't take, and how casually he mentions that most of those people die. Even the best in the world can't help everyone. The rest was standard stuff for the show.

Honestly, I enjoyed the episode for the change of pace, but there wasn't any bombshell dropped. Good character moments all, though.

Okay, now for Lost.

This was an episode about gatherings. Technically, this is one of those "move the pieces around the board" episodes, like a game of Starcraft or something, but more than that, it was about getting our Losties back with each other, after separating them for much of the episode. And if there really is something special about our Candidates, then getting them this close together is going to allow for some serious stuff to go down soon. We start off where we left off, Hurley bringing Jack, Sun, and Lapidas to Locke's camp. Jack confronts Smokey, who freely admits who he is, and thanks Jack for bringing Jack's body with him, so Smokey would have someplace to stay. Which is also how he was Jack's dad. Question answered, internet!

Alternate Locke is in an ambulance with Ben, and arrives at the hospital just as Sun and Jin do. See! Gatherings! Sun doesn't seem happy to see Locke though, freaking out and saying "It's him". Looks like lack of language isn't the only thing starting to bleed through for our special few now.

Claire talks to Jack, and let's him know that he's firmly with Locke now, whether he meant to or not, because Jack let Locke talk to him. That seems to be another theme of this season, that once Smokey talks to you, you're under his spell. Remember this phrase: "You're with him now".

Sawyer and Hurley, a pairing I have missed greatly. Sawyer lets Hurley know that Sayid has gone to the dark side, but you never give Hurley a Star Wars metaphor, because he'll just say that people can be turned back from the dark side...you know, like Anakin.

Sawyer: "Anakin?"

Ahh, missed you two. Oh, and we're back to Alternaworld, with Det. Ford and Kate. And Miles. And apples? And Sayid caught on tape...he's a jabonie?

Back to the Island; Zoey comes in with an ultimatum: Give back Desmond, or missiles go kablooey in their camp. Locke is unimpressed with the threat, and rounds up the gang to move to the boat and go to Hydra Island to take the fight to Widmore. He sends Sawyer to pick up the boat and sail it to the rendevous point, but he instead tells Jack to gather the cool kids and meet him at another dock for some subjacking and escapery.

Alternaworld again, Desmond bumps into Claire (bumps into...riiiight) at the adoption agency, which is on the same floor as Desmond's lawyer buddy...who is Ilana! Oh hai! Missed you since you got all blowed up. Turns out she's been looking for Claire because

Oh hey, back to the Island. Locke sends Sayid to whack Desmond. Desmond's all "why are you gonna kill me, brother?", and Sayid's all "Cause Locke said he'd give me Nadia back". Moral ambiguity!

Back to Alternaworld, I'm getting whiplash. Methinks the shorter intervals might be meant to imply that the walls between these realities are getting thinner and thinner. Anyway, Miles and Sawyer team up to catch Sayid (who gets tripped by a hose? Seriously?).

Island: Locke goes back to find Sayid, Jack grabs the Breakfast Club and head to the boat, Claire sees them and follows.

Alterna: Jack meets Claire, but before he can emote, he gets paged for a hospital emergency. GATHERINGS!!!

Island: Jack and Sawyer have a heart to heart. Jack doesn't think it's time to leave, Sawyer doesn't give a damn about mystical Island crap, he's getting himself a sub and getting home. Sawyer pulls an Air Force One and tells Jack to get off his damn boat...and Jack does. Right into the water.

Alterna: Sun wakes up, her and the baby are fine, and Jin is happy. Life's pretty good if you're a Candidate, huh? Jack walks by on his way to do some spine operating, and notices that his patient is (all together now, kids) Locke!

Island: Sawyer's gang makes it over to Widmoreville, Sun and Jin are finally reunited (which might have been more powerful if they hadn't been together all the time in Alternaworld, but still nice to finally see) (oh, and Sun knows English again now), then Zoey and the rest of the henchmen tell Sawyer that the deal is off. Jack swims ashore, and Smokey walks up with the rest of his expendable pals. Missiles start flying all over the place, and Locke picks up Jack and carries him to safety. What's the last thing Locke says to Jack? "You're with me now". And scene.

So we've got Jack isolated from the pack and with Locke, everybody else is with Widmore, and the hospital seems to be the locus for whatever's going to happen on the Alternaworld side. The end is getting closer and closer, and now that everybody is getting closer together some serious shit's about to go down.

Back in seven for more Lost.

How I Met Your Esposito

Kicking things off is How I Met Your Mother. Last night's was totally a Ted episode, which has been sorely needed, especially after last week. The more I mulled over the last episode, the less I liked it (although I'm still a sucker for a monkey). This time around though, we start off with AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ANGELA PETRELLI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, calmer. It's the actress, but now she's Ted's mom, and she's getting remarried to the perfect living stereotype of New Age hippie nonsense. At the wedding, Ted is bummed out that his mom has essentially lapped him, entering her second marriage while he is still waiting for his first. Skipping out on the toast (which is understandable after Clint's 12+ minute epic song), he disappears for 72 hours, and comes back a homeowner.

And it is the worst house ever, although I loved Barney's line about "Was it difficult to negotiate with the Blair Witch?". While Uncle Ruckus (no really, he does the voice on the Boondocks, seriously) inspects the house, Ted and the gang sit around and talk about feelings. Well, Barney talks more about Robin's feelings, as he won't stop telling people how she teared up at Clint's song. Except she didn't, it was Barney. Because he was sad about the time he made out with Ted's mom. Maybe. And he maybe got to second base. And his penis may be enormous.

Also, we get a new Marshall bit, where he tells a story of a stupid decision he made in his past, and the gang have to guess whether he was drunk, or a kid. Lily's dad should make that one into a board game, then bundle it with "Slap Bet!". After an epic (well, not so much) sledgehammer session, Ted still decides to keep the house, and in a nice montage, we see the torn-up wall become the same wall we see every week as Ted tells his kids this epic story. Very nicely done scene, and as such, the episode didn't even need a tag before the credits. The story of the house is a great insight into Ted (although nothing we didn't already really know), and a tangential take on the central mythology of the show. The Ted that bought this house is the Ted that stole a blue French Horn for Robin, and who will likely do something else impulsive to finally get The Mother...which should happen ANY TIME NOW!!! DO IT!!!

Okay, I'm better. Let's move on to Castle.

The highest compliment (and it is a compliment) that I can pay this show, is that I can't think of any other show on television that could pull off this storyline, and any cast that could walk the line between the levels of emotion pulled off in the episode. We get Flirty Beckett (with Demming, the new cop in town), Wacky Castle (seriously, between his Old Timey poker outfit {and Alexis' matching one...adorable], and his facial expressions through most of the episode), and Ultra Serious Esposito (with a cameo of Serious Ryan), this was a chance for most of the cast to stretch new muscles, especially Jon Huertas, who really stole the show this week. The case had a much smaller suspect pool, and thus the plot was tighter and kept you guessing until the end.

Esposito's arc with his dead partner, who turned out to be his alive/crooked partner, who then turned out to be his still-a-good-guy partner was some great writing coupled with great acting. Was that Jim Cramer as the crime boss? If so, good work from him. It was a better acting job than the one he does when he tries to convince people that he knows anything about the market, that's for sure *rimshot*. Ryan didn't have much to do, but he made the most of two scenes; the quasi-physical comedy of he, Esposito, and Castle swiping Demming's cell phone, and then the more serious scene he had with Esposito near the end of the episode. The concept of partners has been explored a lot on cop shows, and with Castle/Beckett many times on this show, but that one scene emphasized it without belaboring the point, a hard trick to pull off.

Speaking of Demming, I hear he'll be around for a while, and this third wheel in the Castle/Beckett relationship will likely drive the last few episodes of this season; possibly continuing into next year. The two played well together in their scenes this week, so he looks to be a good (temporary?) addition. Meanwhile, I feel inspired to check out some more Jon Huertas and pick up Generation Kill, the HBO miniseries he was in a couple years back.

Next up, LOST, then a big update next week, since I'll be out of town for the return of Thursday comedies, and the next Doctor Who.

Doctor Who Was David Tennant Again?

Okay okay, Matt Smith hasn't achieved that level yet (and never will in the eyes of some fans), but the kid had some massive shoes to fill, and this weekend he at least showed that he knows how to tie a bow.

By the way, I'm going to be recapping these episodes regularly (he said, as FlashForward cries in the corner), and I'll be delving into spoilers, so if you haven't seen the episodes yet, this is your warning.

So when last we left, the Tenth Doctor (the dreamy David Tennant) had saved the world from The Master, the Time Lords, and the return of Gallifrey (home planet of the Time Lords) and all the horrors of the Time War. Then he took a lethal dose of radiation in order to save a simpleton (as he railed against his own nature, knowing that he couldn't let the man die), then got to go on a fanservice field trip (and I mean it in the kindest way possible; it really was a nice coda to his run on the series), followed by regeneration in the TARDIS. The final episode of the Tennant run is worth watching if you missed it, just for his heartwrenching delivery of his last line, "I'm not ready to go". Then up pops young Matt Smith, the Eleventh Doctor.

The opening of the episode is very slapstick, but there's just something earnest in Smith that makes it not only tolerable, but highly enjoyable. Going through his inventory (legs, ears, quite a chin) was fun, as was his "I'm a girl!" when checking out the hair (and that is quite a mop on him). Still not a ginger, however. For whatever reason, his violent regeneration has fucked up the TARDIS, but good, and so he is spiraling out of control at the end of "The End of Time". Tonight's premiere, "The Eleventh Hour", has him clinging to the doorway of the TARDIS as it spins around through the London skyline, finally hauling himself in just in time to crash land in a little girl's backyard.

This little girl, Amelia Pond, has a crack in her wall, and sometimes she can hear the wind coming through it. She wishes for help, and it arrives...and smashes her shed all to hell. The scene where the Doctor climbs out of the TARDIS via grappling hook sells the immense inside of the craft (plus the swimming pool bit was an inspired bit of physical comedy). All the Doctor can think about, however, is needing an apple. Then, in a scene which is sure to be divisive, we flash through a montage of the new Doctor testing out his new body by trying to decide what he wants to eat, involving a lot of shots of him spitting out food. I loved the line "You're Scottish...fry something". He settles on fish fingers and a massive bowl of custard, and young Amelia tells him about her crack. Turns out that it's a crack to an interdimension prison, and Prisoner Zero has escaped. The Doctor runs to the TARDIS and tells Amelia to pack, he'll be back in five minutes. When he comes back, six months have passed, Amelia is gone, and he gets knocked out by a policewoman wielding a cricket bat. Okay, not a policewoman, she's a Kiss-o-gram. Oh, and it's been more than 6 months, it's been twelve years. Oh, and it's Amelia all grown up. Oh, and she's hot. Yeah, I'm shallow like that.

So Prisoner Zero is out, and scary looking, and the aliens that had him imprisoned want him back or dead badly enough to lock the Earth in a forcefield and broadcast that they are going to flash fry the planet unless they get him back, which gives our new Doctor around twenty minutes to save the planet, and his TARDIS is out of commission for repairs. No sweat, right? The Prisoner is also somehow able to take the form of nearby coma patients, making it harder to find. Luckily, Amelia's nurse boyfriend has been taking photos of the patients, in order to prove to his boss that he's really seen them walking around. The Doctor hacks his way into a global chat session of all the geniuses of the world. This part threw me a little, since I thought the Doctor was pretty well known by now, at least by several important people (and, you know, Torchwood), so having to toss out the answers to several scientific mysteries in order to prove his bona fides seemed unnecessary (plus will the ramifications of those revelations be addressed?).

All of this leads to the showdown: The good Doctor has managed to write and distribute (with the help of the chat room genii) a virus that will set all of the world's electronic devices to read 0, a signal for the aliens. The phone also contains all of the guises that Prisoner Zero has been able to take the form of, allowing the alien cops to find and recapture it. Ahh, but P-Zero has one last trick up its hypothetical sleeve: the ability to reach into Amelia's head and take the form of...The Doctor.

Quick aside, for the 12 years the Doctor has been gone, Amelia (well, Amy, so I'll start calling her that) has been obsessed with the Doctor, and convincing people that he was real. Thus, his image, and her child self with him, is burned into her brain enough for the prisoner to take their form. The Doctor is able to reach Amy's subconcious and get her to remember the true form of the Prisoner, that she had seen earlier in the episode. The aliens get their man, the Earth is saved, let's all go home.

Except, not so much. See, the Doctor so far has been freewheeling, a little gawky, basically still getting used to his own form. Not quite serious at all, especially once he starts stripping (and Amy enjoys the show) out of his raggedy old Tennant outfit and liberating new duds from the hospital's locker room. He goes to the roof and has himself a good old fashioned "Come to Jesus" meeting with the Giant Space Eyeball, and basically says "Guess what, I'm the new sheriff in town, Earth is under my jurisdiction, don't threaten it or I swear by my pretty bonnet, I will end you". Great visual of some of the villains of the show's past, followed by a montage of the last ten Doctors, then Smith walking through the projection to stare the aliens down. Could have been corny, but instead was chill-inducing.

And Earth is safe, the TARDIS is fixed (and awesome), and Amy is the new Companion. All is right with the Doctor Who universe, right? Well, until we pan through Amy's room, and her collection of drawings and homemade dolls of her and the Doctor, then in the last visual, a wedding dress. This looks to be a very interesting take on the relationship between Doctor and Companion, similar but different to the Doctor/Rose relationship (the one that helped win over a lot of fans, and made this past run of the show so damn good).

I'm excited about this new run, and new episodes go up on Fridays on BBC America. The show is a couple episodes ahead on British TV, and are available online, but I'll likely stick to watching them live on Fridays, and then recaps should be up on Monday.

Next up, hopefully a new HIMYM, then Lost/Castle, and then the Thursday comedies should be back on this week. We're making the run towards season finale season, then we'll have to see what the summer holds. Excitement!

Great Castle, Greaterer Lost

Holy crap Lost...just...holy crap. But enough about you, let's talk about Castle.

After last week's lackluster episode, Castle bounced back hardcore with "The Late Shaft", a nice mystery that also managed to skewer about three or four different talk show stories of the last few years, and give a little shirtless Nathan Fillion...for the ladies.

Castle is a guest on the Bobby Mann show, played by "Dancing With the Stars (and Kate Gosselin)" host Tom Bergeron. Next thing you know, Bobby is dead, and no one but Castle thinks it was anything but murder. One set of tox screens (and a lot of owed favors) by Lainey later, and it turns out that it was...probably murder. Murder by MAOI inhibitors that were triggered by balsamic vinegar, hidden in cranberry juice. Yes, really. I'm going to just assume that the science is correct, because the alternative is some weird "hey, you got your salad dressing in my bladder infection cure" scenario that none of us want to contemplate. The game is afoot, and they begin unraveling the tangled web of crime. For the record, I had the case solved about halfway through...which I suppose is the point. Meanwhile, Castle is nailing his couch-mate from the talk show, a lovely lady who it turns out is just banging him to try and get the Nikki Heat role in the Heat Wave movie. And oh man, I can't wait for that to enter the show (probably Season 4). They do the usual "banter our way through every other suspect before solving the cast" routine, and it turns out that it was the sidekick that dunnit. One hates to see a second banana go rotten. *ducks thrown shoes*

And now for Lost. Pardon me for a second:

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Okay, I'm better now. So tonight's episode "Everybody Loves Hugo" is one of my favorite flavors of Lost; a Hurley episode. Kicking us off is a slide show of Hurley's Alterna-life, followed by Marvin Candle (aka, Miles' dad) giving Hugo a Man of the Year award for financing a new paleontology wing. Go Hurley! Afterwards, Mama Hurley sets up Hugo on a blind date, since ladies aren't exactly falling all over him. Okay, suspension of disbelief time: There's no way a rich guy isn't getting a few gold diggers throwing themselves at his wallet. Back to the story.

Back on The Island, there's a sweet scene with Hurley sticking a flower in Libby's grave, and talking to her. Well, not "to" her, since she's one of the few dead people to not come back and yell at him. But you know who is here to yell at him? Michael!!! Nice to see you! And spooky title card.

Back at Spanish Johnny's (the most generic name for a Mexican restaurant ever), Hurley is plowing through chips. Rosalita doesn't show, but guess who does? Libby! Everybody gets a trip back to Hawaii! Libby is still crazy, and she claims to remember Hurley from somewhere. After last week, I'd have said "still crazy", but since Desmond can walk between worlds, I'm ready to believe anything. Libby gets put back in the crazy people van, and...

We're back on the Island. Ilana's got some dynamite (which Michael warned Hurley about, but what can you do?), but she pulls an Arzt and blows herself up real good. Poor Ilana, just when I'd remembered her name too.

Over at Locketown, Locke tells Sawyer that they have to leave The Island together, the same way they came back, which means they need to assemble Hurley, Jack, and Sun before they can fly the Anjira plane out of there. Sayid comes back from his kidnapping mission, and brings Locke over to where he's got a surprisingly calm Desmond tied to a tree. The two talk, and Locke unties Desmond because Desmond's "got nowhere to run to". A man without a country, to be sure.

Hurley paws through Ilana's stuff (hey, if she didn't want him to look through it, she'd have told him, right?) and grabs her Bag O' Jacob.

And then boom, right back to Alterna-Hugo, who orders a bucket of chicken from TV's Samm Levine! Desmond happens to stop in for some wings and a biscuit. Coincidence???

Oh hey, back to the Island. Ben, in his usual sunny way, rationalizes Ilana's death by saying "the Island was done with her", and speculating what will happen when the Island is done with the rest of them. Good point, and the death toll is likely to rise. More on that later. They make it to the Black Rock, and then wonder where Hurley is. How do you lose Hurley? Ever? All of a sudden, Hurley comes...lumbering, i guess...out of the jungle, followed by the Black Rock going asplode all over the place.

And back to Hugo, who bribes his way into the loony bin for a sit down with Libby. Libby doesn't remember much, but she does remember plane crash...and an island. Spooky. Hurley asks her out on a date, and...

We pop back to Locke and Desmond, just strolling around the Island, no big deal. Oh, and there's that weird kid who might be Jacob, but probably isn't. Unless he is. And he has a big stick.

By the burning remnants of the Black Rock, Richard is pissed, and makes a new plan to try and scavenge explosives from Camp Dharma in order to blow up that plane. Ben's down with going too, but Hurley puts his foot down and says that Jacob wants them to go talk to Locke. Richard asks Hurley to prove that Jacob is really talking to him, and Hurley nuts up and tells Richard that he doesn't have to prove anything to him. You go, Hurley! In the end, Jack, Sun, and Lapidas follow Hurley, while Ben and Miles head back to Dharmaland with Richard. After a lot of walking, Hurley confesses to Jack that Jacob really didn't talk to him, and Jack tells him that he's pretty much done giving orders. Jack is just going to kick back, trust Hurley, and see what happens next. Interesting switch for Jack, who was Mr. Leader back in the day (and for every day thereafter). Amazing what smashing one lighthouse up will do for your demeanor.

So then the creepy whispers start up, and Hurley wanders out on his own to do something about it. Instead, Michael shows up again, and they have a chat about how he and the other spirits are people who can't move on. Ahh, so Libby has moved on, hopefully. He's also very sorry about shooting Libby, which I suppose is nice of him. Dead people are decent people.

Aww, Hugo and Libby are finally getting to have their beach picnic. Hurley is nervous, but Libby's all smooth, and she kisses him, triggering his memories of the Island days. Okay, that's really spooky. Oh, and Desmond is watching them from his car, like a creeper.

Speaking of Desmond, he and Locke finally make it to their destination: an old well. A deep well, one dug by hand because it is so old. How deep is it? So deep, we don't hear Desmond's splash when Locke chucks him down in it. Buh? Apparently this is Locke's way of keeping Widmore away from...from whatever he wants. Poor Desmond.

Desmond...is back in his car, only now he's being all super-creepy at the school where Locke and Ben teach. Ben comes over to make sure Desmond isn't a pedo, and Desmond makes up a story about his boy, Charlie, and how he'll need a school. That lie (or "lie") came awfully easily. He sees Locke wheeling towards the parking lot, and guns the engine. And then calmly plows through Locke. Wow. Locke got airborne there! Ben kneels over a fallen Locke, who is still alive as we cut to black. LOST...

Wow, so shit's starting to get real. Whatever walls are keeping the Island and the Alterna (or Bizarro) World apart are starting to come down, Locke not only has Desmond out of the picture (or is he), but now the Oceanic 5 + Jin are all intact. Richard's off trying to blow up the plane, and Alterna Life is starting to get interesting. Is it a parallel world? A dream state? And just what happens if NotLocke gets off the Island. We are down to a handful of episodes left, and you couldn't pay me to miss a single one. Back in seven days, folks.

Finally

The long awaited return of How I Met Your Mother has sent me into a tizzy of excitement. Then the episode threatened to make me sad. Then the ended made me all happy all over again. Let me explain:

We start off with Barney telling the story of how he convinced a girl that he was Neil Armstrong and was reverse-aging. They story got him laid, which was deserved. Anyone who can pull that off deserves a reward...IN HIS PANTS. Up top!

So then after a discussion of how much Marshall likes pizza, he reveals that he was mugged. Mugged? In New York? Oh noes! Lily freaks out over the news, and Robin tempts her towards the dark side with a REALLY BIG GUN. Seriously huge. Suspension of disbelief follows, as we cut to Lily at the shooting range, and her arms should have been torn clean off of her body by the recoil from Robin's hand cannon. Marshall, not wanting Lily to get a gun, reveals that he was actually mugged by a monkey. Only Marshall...and the gang goes into the patented "sit around the booth and crack jokes about the situation" scenes, although Barney's suppositions about the involvement of a banana really made the scene. Robin, whose morning show is still the equivalent of watching paint dry (Or like three episodes of Chuck), insists that Marshall come on her show and tell the story. Marshall is forced to reveal to Ted and Barney that the story is a fake that he made up to stop Lily from buying a gun. Of note is the fact that Ted can't tell if Marshall is lying or not.

So we all come together in the end at Robin's show; Ted and his mystery sheet (containing his scale model of the Empire State Building), the creepy doll guy, the bored camera man and his paper airplanes, and of course, the money that may or may not have robbed Marshall. Marshall becomes the ultimate guy in the middle here: If he was mugged by a person, then Lily will buy a gun and Robin loses her journalistic credibility. If he was mugged by a monkey, then the monkey will be separated from his mate, and Marshall will be a national laughingstock. What does Marshall do? Well, he goes home, and no one ever knows what the truth was.

Now, what turns this episode from "Any episode of any sitcom" to "How I Met Your Mother-worthy"? Well, the monkey escapes, grabs a doll, and climbs to the top of the scale Empire State Building, then is bombarded by paper airplanes. A long way to go to set up a joke? Oh yes. Oh hells yes. And that's why I missed you, How I Met Your Mother. <3

Once again: Lost and Castle

So thanks to college basketball, there has been a dearth of new episodes of my usual shows. However, two shows refuse to roll over and cede their timeslot to sports. I thank you, Lost and Castle.

Castle this week was one of the "Dull case, fun business" episodes that I really have to be in the mood for. In this case, it was a guy getting squished by a gargoyle, which led to a mummified Mayan king and a wacky curse that let's Nathan Fillion be zany, but doesn't really add much to the story. On the other hand, there wasn't much story, so let the zaniness ensue!

The case was a never-ending series of false leads, double-backs, plots within plots, and it almost had me asleep. Castle's antics were much funnier, what with the detectives pranking him hardcore in order to make him believe in the curse. Honestly though, the coffee machine blowing up was over the top, both for the show, and as a believable act by Beckett (and Ryan, and Esposito). Then the story takes an odd serious turn (more of a slight divot), as Castle asks Beckett to take care of Alexis if something did happen to him. Came out of nowhere, and that was a revelation that would have been better suited to a more serious episode, honestly. The case finally comes to an end, and then Beckett gets a Mayan activist (who has conveniently been hanging out in a cell all episode) to tell Castle how to "Reverse the Curse". However, whatever he has to do, happens off-screen. Why?!?! All that, and you don't give him one last bit of physical business to do, as a payoff for an entire hour of boredom? Not a great episode, unfortunately, especially coming off of last week's incredible two-parter.

Lost, on the other hand, was outstanding. People (okay, mainly ladies) looooooove Desmond, and we got all we could handle tonight. We start out with Desmond (aka, last week's "Package") waking up with Zoey tending to him. Widmore comes into the room, and Desmond goes apeshit on him with an IV stand. Widmore needs Desmond for a test, and as we see from the sciencey stuff around (and Angstrom the bunny), it involves electricity. A LOT of electricity. Desmond is the only person to have survived a major catastrophic electromagnetic event (aka, the one that brought down 815 all the way back then), and they need to test him...using big coily things that fried the crap out of the poor redshirt as they were dragging Desmond out there. They toss him in the box (oh yeah, Jin is there, too, not that it makes a difference), and he gets zapped...

And wakes up as Alterna-Desmond! There's Hurley! And Claire! George the limo driver/hooker acquisitionist takes Desmond to see Widmore, whom he works for. And hugs. Desmond has money, a sweet life, and no family. Poor Desmond. He gets to pick up Charlie (squeeeee!!!, said the fangirls) from jail and chaperone him long enough to play a gig with Widmore's son. Charlie heads over to the nearest bar, and the two drink while Charlie asks him about love, and shares a vision he had (probably about Claire) when he was choking on his Bag O' Smack back on 815. They hop in the car, and Charlie grabs the wheel and sends them crashing into the marina (in like ten feet of water, it looks like). Desmond can't save Charlie, but dives back down to try again. Charlie puts his hand on the glass, and Desmond has a flashback to Charlie drowning back in the underwater station (with "Not Penny's Boat" written on his hand). Desmond gets Charlie out of the car, and we join him back in the hospital with a nasty head wound. They pop him in an MRI machine (magnetic resonance, in case you didn't know), and they triggers visions of Penny. He freaks out and bolts to try and find Charlie, running into Jack. Charlie comes flying out of another room, bare ass flapping in the breeze. Charlie tells Desmond that "none of this matters", and that he should look for Penny.

Desmond heads over to the charity ball to break the bad news about Driveshaft to Widmore's wife...Eloise. She seems nonplussed by the news about Charlie, saying (wait for it...) "What happened, happened". Walking away, Desmond overhears Penny's name on an invitation list, but then Eloise flips out when he asks about it, saying he's not ready for her, and to stop looking. Walking away, Desmond is approached by Widmore's son...Daniel Faraday (pianist, not physicist). Woot, I missed him. Faraday (sorry, Widmore...ahh hell, Daniel) talks of love, of seeing Charlotte (not named as such though) and drawing advanced physics equations in his notebook. Ahh, so apparently memories are bleeding through to this dimension/reality/etc. Daniel is afraid that this world isn't supposed to exist, and he has the nagging feeling that he blew up a nuclear bomb at some point to create this world. Lucky for Desmond, Daniel knows where Penny (his half-sister...ooh, who's the mother?) will be...running stairs in an empty stadium (echoes of the past!). Desmond shakes Penny's hand...

And wakes up back in the electric box, back on The Island. He's only been out for a few seconds, and now he's all totally willing to help Widmore with his mysterious project. Seems like Widmore needs Desmond to help set reality straight maybe? Just a guess. Desmond and the gang head out, and make it about twenty paces before Jack Bauer...err, Sayid pops up, snaps a neck, and tells Zoey to run. He tells Desmond to come with him, and Desmond does, just like that.

But wait, there's more. We flash over to Alterna-Desmond, who has come to after fainting from Penny's touch. Interesting. She agrees to meet him for coffee, and he heads back to the limo. He asks George for a whore...I mean, for the 815 passenger manifest, because he wants to "show them something". And we're out.

So, Desmond (who as we all remember, is the Constant) is back in play, and looks to be a very important piece in both timelines. We're really starting to get rolling with only seven more hours of Lost left...ever.

Oh, and next week, we get a Hurley episode, and some Michael! Yeehaw!